Tattoos - Taboo or To-Do?

To paraphrase Mr. Shakespeare, To Have or Not to Have – that is the question! To be clear, I’m referring to the tattoos people get that had some thought behind them, NOT the ones that only had a drunken night out with the guys or girls behind them.

So, a little story. I was at a friends 50^th birthday party. We left the restaurant feeling really happy, walked down the strip mall to the tattoo parlor convinced we each wanted a small tattoo. Thank goodness the artists in the shop chased us out. They very firmly stated their policy of refusing to tattoo anyone that was drunk. Otherwise, I might have a tramp stamp of heaven only knows what!

Moving On!

Anyway, I’ve been fascinated by meaningful and artistic tattoos for 35+ years. In my photographer days, I gave very serious consideration to making a coffee table type of book featuring unique tattoos and the stories that went with them. I had photo/story releases all typed up, was ready to start looking for volunteers and, well, life.

When I was growing up, I don’t remember anyone that had a tattoo. Definitely not my immediate family. Maybe some of my uncles who’d been in the military, or maybe some cousins. No one ever mentioned them, though.

I also don’t recall my parents specifically stating that they were forbidden. I wasn’t allowed to get my ears pierced until I was 16 and, until I was out on my own, that was the only piercing I was allowed. So, I’m pretty sure something would have been discussed if the subject had arisen.

Looking for Help

Fast forward to 2023 when I was far-too-quickly approaching my 65^th birthday. I had been struggling more than usual with depression and anxiety. I’m not one to jump on taking medications so I’d been trying to journal, hoping that would help. I’d try meditation very sporadically, but no help. Honestly, everything I tried didn’t work because I wasn’t consistent. I wasn’t consistent because I’m also impatient and, since nothing seemed to help right away, I tossed it aside looking for something else.

Then, as I was scrolling through Facebook reels as one does, I saw a lotus blossom tattoo and felt a real connection. I researched the meaning behind the lotus tattoo, what part of the body was the least tender (I mean, who wants their first tattoo to hurt like crazy?!) and got some recommendations about tattoo artists in town. Turns out, we have a WHOLE lot more than I would have guessed for the size of our town.

I approached one artist and, as nice as she could, she declined my simple design because it wasn’t really the style she specialized in.

Back to the Facebook

Yup, where else do we go anymore! A random “you might be interested in this business” post showed up one day for another tattoo shop, so I reached out. Turned out to be the perfect match of artist and client.

The shop – and I hope she doesn’t mind me mentioning her – was Black Cat Tattoos and the artist was Sabrina. She was very patient with me as I explained the very simple black outline lotus tattoo that I wanted. She helped me determine the best place (my wrist!) and she explained each step of the process along the way.

Since then, I have gotten five additional tattoos from Sabrina, as well as having her color up my first one. They are on both forearms and one on each upper arm. And every single one was designed with purpose. Most are reminders that help when I start to struggle. Another is a reminder of the people I hold most dear. Another is more spiritual in nature.

What about the Stigma?

Honestly – at 67 years old, I do not let that worry me. I’ve worked in offices and retail since getting them and no one has said anything or treated me any differently. (They probably think that, as old as I am, I’ve had them for much longer than a couple of years. LOL)

My parents are both deceased, but I’m guessing they wouldn’t have been too happy with me. I don’t think I even posted photos of them on Facebook, so my out-of-town friends and family may not even know I got them.

Surprise!

Have they helped?

Overall, yes. I have four that are specifically meant to help me calm down, look for balance, and remember that everything is going to be fine – even if the moment is a struggle.

They aren’t a cure all, though they absolutely have helped. It’s rather difficult to explain how but they do. Two of the tattoos are almost a code that is only meant for me to understand. They are beautiful and even though others can see them, I’ve designed my tattoos such that the meanings of each are most clear to me alone.

But, they are permanent!

Yes. Yes they are.

I firmly believe that the vast majority of those with tattoos want and/or need them as permanent reminders. A tattoo can be commemorative, artwork, self-expression, memorialization, self-help … it can be whatever the wearer decides.

Do the colors fade? Over time, but you can have them touched up. Do the designs sag as the body ages? Some will, although mine likely won’t because they’re on my arms. Do they cause employment problems? Some might but mine haven’t.

Time to Stop

It’s 2025 – a quarter of the way through the 21^st century. People have gotten tattoos for hundreds, well, thousands of years! (FYI, the first known tattooed person dates back to 3500 BCE!) It’s high time society moves past this ridiculous stigma.

STOP judging others based on the tattoos they have. They may regret some, but removal is costly and painful. They may already be in the process of getting a cover-up, too. You don’t know!

STOP forcing your personal beliefs on others. They might be open to a meaningful exchange of ideas but telling them tattoos are wrong is not your purpose in life!

STOP acting like people with tattoos are all criminals or live a risky lifestyle or are gang members. The “average joe” was getting tattoos long before gangs and criminals were!

I love my tattoos. I probably won’t get any new ones, but I will appreciate the ones I have and the artist that did them. That is all that matters to me. That should be all that matters to everyone else, too.